Wise Confucius Meme Generator

You open the energy bill in the hallway, still in your coat. The number is not a number you agreed to. You stand there and realise the heating has been on since March, and you have been calling it "just the one lamp".

The bus pulls away as you reach the stop, so you run after it for a full thirty seconds out of pride. At the next stop it is still sitting there, doors open. You get on with the dignity of a man who has lost a race to himself.

Someone at work delivers a piece of advice as if it were carved on a mountain. It turns out to be a pun. Everyone nods slowly, because it's quarter to five and nobody wants to be the one to say so.

You come out of the shower and find the towel situation has gone badly wrong. You made one decision in your twenties about towels and have been living with the consequences ever since.

Why it caught on: the picture is a traditional painted portrait of Confucius, the Chinese philosopher, set on red and yellow rays in the usual advice animal style. It borrowed the old "Confucius say" joke, which existed long before the internet: a fake proverb in mock broken English, usually ending in a pun or a rude punchline, and always a caricature of how Chinese people speak, not anything the real Confucius said. The format was easy to write and the wise, unbothered face made even the daftest line sound like a ruling.

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