Did You Ever Hear the Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise? Meme Generator

The taxi driver says "you know what the problem with this city is?" and you know you're not getting out of this one. It's a 25-minute ride. He needs 40.

Your hairdresser has the scissors by your ear when she asks if she ever told you about her divorce. You can't leave. You have half a fringe.

Your dad slows the car outside the house he grew up in. "See that tree?" Nobody asked about the tree. You're going to hear about the tree.

A coworker sits down next to you with a coffee and says "so I had the weirdest dream". It isn't weird. It is, however, very long.

Why it caught on: in Revenge of the Sith (2005) Palpatine leans over in his box at the opera and asks Anakin whether he ever heard the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise - "I thought not. It's not a story the Jedi would tell you." The whole monologue became a copypasta, pasted in full into comment threads at the slightest excuse, and its opening line stands for any story nobody asked to hear.

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Best Did You Ever Hear the Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise? posts

• teacher: kid: rocks in chair* / "did you ever hear of the tradegy of the kid who broke his neck?"
• Me: Swings on a chair Teacher: Have you heard the tragedy of the kid who leaned on the chair
• DARTH PLAGUEIS WAS A DARK LORD OF THE SITH, SO POWERFUL AND SO WISE HE COULD USE THE FORCE TO INFLUENCE THE MIDICHLORIANS TO CREATE FOOD… / HE HAD SUCH A KNOWLEDGE OF THE DARK SIDE, HE COULD EVEN OUT-PIZZA THE HUTT.
• ARE YOU FAMILIAR WITH THE THOUGHT EXPERIMENT, ‘THE SHIP OF THESEUS’? / IN THE FIELD OF IDENTITY METAPHYSICS?
• ME: LEANING ON THE CHAIR THE TEACHER: / DID YOU HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF THE KID WHO BROKE HIS NECK?
• ME: GOES OUTSIDE FOR 0.1 SECONDS WITHOUT JACKET / MY NANA: DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TALE OF THE KID WHO FROZE TO DEATH
• DON'T LISTEN TO BEN KENOBI. HE'S A CONSPIRACY THEORIST
• DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF DARTH TROLL THE BAITER?
• TEACHER: YOU CAN'T HEAR IMAGES ME:
• DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF DARTH IGNORANT THE WRONG?
• DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF HARVEY WEINSTEIN THE WISE / HARVEY WEINSTEIN WAS A DARK LORD OF THE SITH, SO POWERFUL AND SO WISE HE COULD USE THE FORCE TO INFLUENCE THE MIDICHLORIANS TO CREATE LIFE... HE HAD SUCH A KNOWLEDGE OF THE HOLLYWOOD SYSTEM THAT HE COULD EVEN KEEP THE ONES HE CARED ABOUT FROM DYING. THE DARK SIDE OF THE FILMMAKING IS A PATHWAY TO MANY ABILITIES SOME CONSIDER TO BE UNNATURAL. HE BECAME SO POWERFUL... THE ONLY THING HE WAS AFRAID OF WAS LOSING HIS POWER, WHICH EVENTUALLY, OF COURSE, HE DID. UNFORTUNATELY, HE TAUGHT HIS APPRENTICE EVERYTHING HE KNEW, THEN HIS APPRENTICE KILLED HIM IN ATTACK . IT'S IRONIC HE COULD SAVE OTHERS FROM DEATH, BUT NOT HIMSELF.
• DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE TWO THIRSTY BOXERS? / ONE BEAT THE OTHER TO THE PUNCH
• Nobody: Humanity right now: / DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF CHUCK NORRIS' DEATH?
• DID YOU HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF HISTORY BOOKS?
• LITTLE KIDS: WOW! THEY MUSTY BE TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING IMPORTANT AT THE STUDENT COUNCIL MEETING! WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING: / DID YOU HEAR OF THE TRAGEDY OF DARTH PLAGUEIS THE WISE?
• Nobody: Humanity right now: / DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF CATHERINE O'HARA'S DEATH?
• Nobody: Humanity right now: / DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF TOMMY DECARLO'S DEATH?
• Nobody: Humanity right now: / DID YOU EVER HEAR THE TRAGEDY OF GERALD FORD'S DEATH?
• Have you ever heard the tragedy of von Bismarck the Iron? / I thought not. It isn't a story the French would tell you. Von Bismarck was a Chancellor of Prussia so intelligent, and so nationalist, he could use politics to manipulate Europe to create Germany... He had such a knowledge of Realpolitik that he could even keep the nation he loved from dying. Germany became so powerful, that the only thing he was afraid of was losing it, which eventually, of course it did. Unfortunately, the new Kaiser was most unwise, then he was dismissed as Chancellor. Ironic. He could create Germany with intelligence, but he could not grant it.
• ME WHEN SOMEONE ASKS ME TO TELL A STORY: / Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise?